What I Wish I Could Say

a poem

There are so many things

I wish I had said.

So many things

You need to know.

I do not want to keep ignoring

Or keep pretending.

---

You taught me to be honest,

And I know I need to be now.

More than ever.

You believe things that aren’t true.

How can I change this

When nothing I say breaks through?

---

No it’s not her fault.

Or mine, or theirs.

Responsibility is the right thing,

The admirable thing to do.

That’s what you taught me to do.

---

So much to say

But I don’t have the breath to say it.

Or the inspiration.

Trying to right your wrongs

Fix your mistakes

Clean your messes.

---

Time has passed on for too long

For life to switch and

Right its course in the

History of our lives.

Not out of impatience or anger—

Not anymore.

---

There are so many things

I wish I could say.

So many thoughts, feelings

You don’t get to know.

I don’t want to keep ignoring.

But now there is too much to say.

---

Patience only lasts so long.

Even the monarchs, those butterflies,

know when to go.